/You say: “I do not have a doubt the direction of the practice”, then later you regard yourself as an ignorant little worm, do you believe that this is the direction of the practice? Only the Buddhas can penetrate in the dojo, it is in this state that one is authorized to practice zazen.
And the Buddhas raise questions to let the dharma be heard, for the good of all./

Precisely, as regards the direction of the practice what I believe or not does not have really any importance because one should not stick to beliefs which can be pure illusion.

It is notorious that one is not Bouddha all the time, which is not contradictory with the state of ignorant small worm which I feel I am sometimes myself, states quite as transitory as illusory, and even when they would be that way, the practice is judicious to help us to embrace our contradictions to be able to exceed them. San Do Kai also says that to stick to the practice is an illusion. The illusions are necessary, but everything is only vacuity...

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Answer from Master Kosen

You use zen words in a relatively intelligent way, to keep you in the compromise of your karma, but where did you take from this stupid dogma of the direction of the practice and that what you believe or not has any importance, the direction of the practice is called Bodai shin and it is fundamental, the fact of understanding that everything is illusory does not have to lead us to nihilism, but to creativity. Everything is illusory thus everything is possible, it is the play-ground of the boddhisattvas. The vision that you describe is that of the practice of a coward who amounts having in his pocket an invaluable stone by taking it for a vulgar one.
Moreover, the awakening consists in realizing that one is Bouddha all the time.
That which is observed as a small worm is quiet and without emotion, it understands that this small worm is not its true nature.
Then if you believe you are a small worm, your nature creates a small worm.
Thus what you believe or not, creates your reality. It is thus necessary to believe in our permanent nature of Buddha and from there to create a brilliant illusion impregnated by this essence.

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