Question
When young women called Saint Francis of Assisi a saint, he would reply, “I am not a saint; I could give you a child.” To me, that is a koan, and my interpretation is that holiness, like awakening, does not exist. What supposedly awakened being can be certain of his reaction to the death of his son, a cancer diagnosis, his own death, or the sight of a beautiful naked woman…?
Anonymous
Answer from Master Kosen
One day Francis, Saint Francis, was walking behind Brother Leo through the forest. Both were accustomed to these silent walks through woods colored by the seasons. They descended the slopes of a ravine, at the bottom of which a torrent roared. The place was secluded and possessed a wild, pure beauty. The water leaped over rocks, white and exultant, with brief flashes of azure. It spread a great coolness that penetrated the surrounding undergrowth.
A few junipers had grown here and there between the rocks overhanging the bubbling water.
”Our sister water!” Francis exclaimed as he approached the torrent. “Her purity sings of divine innocence.”
Leaping from rock to rock, Brother Leo soon crossed the torrent. Francis followed, taking longer. Leo stood waiting on the opposite bank, watching the clear water flow swiftly, and when Francis joined him, Leo remained contemplative. He seemed unable to tear himself away from the sight. Francis looked at him and saw sadness on his face.
”You look thoughtful,” he said simply.
”If we could have just a little of that purity,” Leo replied,
“we too would know our sister water’s wild, overflowing joy and irresistible momentum.”
A deep longing ran through his words. Leo gazed sadly at the torrent, endlessly flowing away in its elusive purity.
”Come!” Francis said, pulling him by the arm.
They resumed their walk, and after a long silence, Francis asked his friend:
“Brother, do you know what purity of heart is?"
"Having no fault to reproach oneself for,” Leo answered without hesitation.
”Ah! I understand your sadness,” Francis told him. “We always have something to reproach ourselves for."
"Exactly,” said Leo, “and that is precisely what makes me despair of ever attaining purity of heart.”
Francis said to him:
“Listen, Brother Leo, do not concern yourself so much with your soul’s purity. Turn your gaze instead toward universal existence. Admire it; rejoice in what it is, in all its purity, spontaneity, and grace. That itself, little brother, is having a pure heart. And when you are thus turned toward God, do not turn back upon yourself; do not even ask where you stand. Your sadness at not being perfect is still a human feeling. You must broaden your gaze, expand your vision. The pure heart perceives and turns toward the living God.”
Then Leo replied:
“But holiness and purity require our effort."
"Holiness is not self-accomplishment, nor a fullness we give ourselves. Holiness is first an emptiness, provided we accept it, and that emptiness will fill with universal existence to the extent that we open ourselves.”
Kosen