Question
For several years, my 19-year-old son has been “going bad”: pot, graffiti, police custody, and already a 22-month suspended sentence… I live alone with him and his sister, who, by contrast, causes me no trouble. He carries heavy karma, and I feel powerless. Despite everything, he is a good boy whom I can talk to and who respects me, but he has no involvement in family life and never follows anything through. A real product of the “priority education zone,” as some would say… I wonder to what extent the upbringing we give our children influences their karma. I love him and fear for him. Gassho.
Anonymous
Answer from Master Kosen
It is difficult for a mother alone to take full responsibility for a child’s upbringing.
The relationship with the father and the parents’ relationship with each other, even if they are separated, are very important.
We must rediscover initiation rites for both adolescent boys and girls to help them enter adulthood; otherwise they will seek initiation in the street by doing what we call stupid things.
Kosen