Question
Master,
When someone in your family, unconsciously, simply because of their karma—that is, although this person maintains good relations with us and although contact is limited but deep because of blood ties—
hurts us very, very badly, to the point of no longer wanting to live so much that it becomes necessary to lose one's life, how can this be resolved?
I have tried many paths, but in the end it is always the same: I surrender and accept. But I need this to change because it is very harmful.
Could you help me?
Gassho.
Kiku Ai
Answer from Master Kosen
Through practicing zazen, through ordination, and by taking some distance, we can considerably lessen family karma. However, the conscious or unconscious behavior of some people close to us may have hurt us deeply and affected us over the long term. Sometimes it is helpful to begin therapy to articulate and uncover the true root of the problem.
Kosen