QUESTION : When satori sucks.
I shall want to speak about Satori and I shall mean that we can meditate, we can do zazen all our lives and experiment satori or the kundalini a million times, 4 times a day, even if it is still violence, or isolation, we become a buddha or a god for ourselves but life is not this. Now, if I feel a satori is coming I want to throw it out, it annoys me because I see that it makes me be apart from the world. I want no more satori, it is not that I knew it but I want to throw it out of my life, it is a virus. What I want is to relate with others and the world, what I want is to be able to observe, find, understand the world with all my attention. A huge amount of energy is required and I don't have it, I often get lost in myself, I often return. There is no road and no obstacles, we are as newborns.
A disciple may want a master or a master may want a disciple. A man may meditate in front of a wall for 9 years, he would lose 9 years of his life. Life is in relation with others and the world.
ANSWER :

What separate us from the rest of the world it is not certainly the Satori.
The kind of contradiction that you expressed is called a disease of the spirit.

KOSEN!

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